You like the title don’t ya… well stop your salivating cause it’s not that type of banging!

This banging is less bedroom and more salon.

That’s right, a few months ago I got bangs. Now this might not seem like a big deal to you, but for me it was a little bit of a journey that required me getting over my bang-a-phobia

It all started when I forced myself to go to a new hairdresser. How did I force myself you ask? Well, I bought a Groupon because I knew my natural frugality would kick in and override my fear of trying something new.

Why did I need something new you ask? Well my old hairdresser (who is lovely BTW but maybe we just weren’t in the zone anymore) kept giving me what I like to call the dreaded Mommy cut – you know the one, some light layers, sitting at the shoulders so it has no choice but to flip out in a very June Cleaver type of way – and I was sick of it.

So off I went with my Groupon to this trendy salon and the first thing I told the stylist was that I was a mother of three but, that I didn’t want to have a haircut that advertised that. I stressed that I still wanted to have something that could be funky. I said I was considering cutting my hair shorter and asked what she thought. That was when she brought up the dreaded word… BANGS.

Before I describe what happened next I have to tell you why BANGS were a dreaded word. Six years ago, pre-children and right before my husband and I were about to leave on a backpacking trip across Western Europe, I got a little too inspired by Jennifer Garner in Alias and I asked my hairdresser for bangs like her.

The results were hideous. From the moment I left the salon  – and let’s face it this is the worst possible sign because immediately post salon your hair should be looking it’s most fabulous because it was just professionally styled – I was noticing weird looks from people on the street. The bangs were hanging all weird. She put product in them and they were clumping together and sticking out and the whole thing was a big mess.

I didn’t know how to style them so I gave up and tried to just side sweep them and pretend they weren’t there… but they were so there. The real tragedy is that all the pics from my joyous Europe trip have me looking like a small child had gotten to my hair with safety scissors.

See the photographic evidence. Yup it was bad.

So of course when this new hairdresser mentioned bangs in my head I was all: HELL NO YOU WON”T BE GIVING ME BANGS!! But on the outside I was super calm.  I gently mentioned that I wasn’t really sure as I had had bangs once before and they were less than satisfactory.  But somehow she put me at ease and convinced me and before I knew it I had these totally gorgeous bangs that I totally loved and still love 3 months later.

She was great. Not only did she cut the bangs, she taught me a few tricks for styling them.

The tricks she taught me for styling bangs:

1) NO PRODUCT IN BANGS! They need to be soft and not weighed down.

2) When you blow dry the bangs blow dry them one way across you forehead, then the other way. This makes them lay nice and flat without those dreaded peek-a-boo windows.

3) No one wants to wash their hair everyday cause it dries it out. Instead she told me to just wet my bangs down and re-blow dry them so they looked freshly styled each day.

Good tips right. Wish I knew that 6 years ago!

Anyway, so I like my bangs but (yes there is always a but) the one thing that sucks about bangs is that they grow.

They grow so fast!!

So I have to schedule bang trims which are a bitch because the salon is all the way downtown and we all know I live in the country now and I am no where near downtown. Because I was avoiding making the appointment for my trim, my bangs were looking a bit sheep dog.

But you know the old saying: If you bang it, they will come!

What?? IS that not an old saying?

OK Well anyway, I lucked out when I met a Mom at school who is a hairdresser and she offered to cut my very long, poking me in the eyeballs, yes I realize you can’t see anything above my nose, bangs in her funky little studio that is just minutes away from my house.

So the little trim was today and since I looked like death this morning, I thought I better slap on some mascara before I jetted over there. Yes, this is where the eyelashes part comes into the story.

I was curling away with my fabtastic eyelash curler when I heard a scream. Not like a whine scream or a don’t take my toys scream, but a Mommy I need help!!! scream. So I ran in the direction of the scream.

Problem… I forgot to un-clamp the eyelash curler before I started my pumping running arms.

Ouch.

Worse than ouch… Ugly.

My kid was fine, but I managed to rip out a large portion of my eye lashes on the right hand side of my left eye. I tried to fan out the other lashes with mascara. I don’t think it is totally noticeable because no one has said anything yet but perhaps they are all just being nice.

So what did we learn here: Bangs good. Running with eyelash curler bad.

What about you, any bang or other hair horror stories? Am I the only person to rip my eyelashes out in this fashion?? Hmmm wait a minute, maybe don’t answer that second one.

 

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