This Saturday I will be in two places at once. I know what you are thinking: Kimberley you are a super mom who has clearly raised genius children, one who was momentarily potty trained at 8 months old, one who sings along to Viagra commercials and the other whose gap tooth smile could bring about world peace, but can you really be in two places at one time?!?
Well yes actually, I can. On Saturday morning at 10am I will be a guest on the radio show Real Parenting but I will also be home, in my kitchen, making my Blueberry and Lemon Pancakes for my family.
Yeah that’s just how I roll. I’m a high flying mother, my life is G-L-A-M-O-R-O-U-S YESSSSSS.
Did you believe that last part? If so then you haven’t been reading my blog long enough.
No, I don’t lead a glamorous life, but I have been on the radio a few (maybe like 6 or 7) times and I’m not going to lie, each time the host of Real Parenting, Shirley Broback, asks me to come back on the show I do a few jumpy-claps and then I proceed to bite my nail (not plural) neurotically due to nervousness and anticipation (have I ever told you how I allow myself one sacrificial nail to bite… told you glamorousssss) because the whole thing is hella nerve racking. But, it is also really fun and I am incredibly grateful for the opportunity to experience being on a live radio show.
So getting back to how I can be in two places at once; sometimes, when I am invited on the show it is a pre-tape. This means that we head into the studio before the air date of the show and we record the show so it can be played later. Obviously Shirley’s show, like most radio, is normally live, but there are a few shows that fall on holidays that need to be pre-taped.
You might think the pre-taped shows would be easier, but I actually find them more nerve racking. We still don’t get do-overs, there is no going back and taping a segment a second time, what is taped is what will be played. The part that is hard about the pre-tape is that I always dread the show airing because I have had time to think about the things I said and how I sounded and I get a bit embarrassed and nervous.
It’s silly because I don’t really care what people think of me but, I would hate to come across as not myself or fake. I especially don’t want to come across that way when we talk about important topics like body image which will be on the upcoming show. If you read my last post you know a bit about how I feel about body image and will understand why it’s important to me.
I am excited for the show to air and I hope I was able to express myself effectively while in the studio with all the distracting thoughts running through my mind. To give you an idea of what it is like to be on a radio show, here is a selection of some of the thoughts that ran through my head last time:
Am I too close to the microphone? Is my voice too soft? Why do I suddenly feel like I need to clear my throat? Don’t turn your head Kimberley, keep the microphone centered. Ahhhh commercial break, good I am sooo thirsty. Don’t run on Kimberley, wrap it up, wrap it up, Shirley is giving you the wrap up eyes. Why do I feel like I have to burp? OMG I can’t burp on the radio? I never burp, WTH, oh, ok, false alarm. Smile. Eye contact. Commercial. OMG I didn’t know we were talking about this!?! I don’t know about the Kinder Egg thing! How did I miss the Kinder Egg thing?!? What!?! I didn’t know she was moving. Great, now I seem rude. Damn that new Facebook and all the things I miss. Sh*t, I moved my head away from the microphone. The producer guy is going to be so annoyed with me. WTH, why do I need to clear my throat… again! Two more minutes, keep it short Kimberley. Phhhewww, all done, act cool like it was no thang. Holy sh*t what did I just say in the last hour, I bet I made a total ass of myself but dang, that was fun!!
Tune in to CFax 1070am on Saturday, August 4th at 10am to hear me on Real Parenting. If you want to pretend like you don’t know me afterwards, I won’t hold it against you!